C4J: Jeff, what is your take on the recent comments by Senator Obama?

Jeff: I have always been against unnecessary cosmetic applications on pigs.  Pigs will not wear lipstick in my Empire. Rabbits maybe, but not pigs.

C4J: Do you think he meant to attack Gov. Palin?

Jeff: It’s hard to say, but he’s making it easier for me to win.

C4J: How is that?

Jeff: The more Obama attacks Palin, the less the media focuses on our campaign.

C4J: But don’t you want media attention?  How else are you going to win?

Jeff: We’re counting on a surprise lead come November.  We want people to wake up on November 3rd, hear that I’m their Emperor, and when the surprise wears off, hit their snooze bars.

C4J: So, you want Americans to be surprised and then subsequently late to work?

Jeff: Yes, they will be working for me then, so they will need the extra sleep.

Our interview with Jeff continues tomorrow with his thoughts on the environment. Preview: “I’m all for the environment, as long as it stays outside.”